Bowen's First Haircut

I cut Bowen's hair for the first time today. I have only ever trimmed the hair above his eyes when it got too long and bothered him.

But I cut it all over today. And it made me kinda sad. I am actually mourning the loss of his long hair. I think Brandon is, too.

Bowen had this beautiful, long toddler hair that curled up on the bottom in "wings". It was freakin' adorable. And, as is typical for me, I did not care that his hair was long and he was a little boy (often mistaken at the park for a girl because of it) because his hair was just too beautiful to chop yet. And toddlers look great with long hair. They still have that uber soft baby hair that is a joy to look at and touch.

But, I realized as the weather has gotten warmer that Bowen's hair was making him hot and sweaty. And it's only going to get hotter. So I resolved to cut it. After much struggle, lots of convincing, only a little crying, and mommy following toddler all around the living room with a pair of scissors, I managed to complete our first haircut endeavor. Bowen now has a very boyishly short haircut. It makes him look older and I am not used to it at all. But it is certainly growing on me and I always enjoy an opportunity to see my son in a new light and appreciate him anew. Possible pictures later on his blog.

Sad Momma Sad

So I just wrote this on Amanda's Facebook Wall and realized that I just need to get out some thoughts after watching the riveting, question-filled, disturbing piece of cinematic genius that is "Gone Baby Gone":

I am so frickin sad right now. I just watched "Gone Baby Gone." I... dang... I dunno, I just feel so conflicted. Which was absolutely the point, right? I mean, great job Ben Affleck, I will officially stop making fun of him now. lol. But, holy mother of crapity crapkins, saaaad sad movie. Or really: saaaad, sad world.

Let me first just say: see the movie. It is great. Just because something makes you uncomfortable doesn't mean it is not wholly worth watching. Like any good piece of art, it should make you question at the very least.

There are so many things I appreciate about the movie that I want to hash out, but I'm going to stick with one main idea: What is our responsibility, singularly and collectively, to do something about the rampant child abuse occurring worldwide?

The point, and the whole piece of the disturbing pie is that the movie is not just a movie - it is a reflection of real life events and ongoing problems we have in this world. I feel like a lot of people will just walk away from seeing something like "Gone Baby Gone" and feel like they are not big enough, powerful enough, significant enough to make a difference in relation to an enormous problem like child kidnapping/abuse/molestation/rape/mistreatment/abduction/etc. And I feel like that is honestly the wrong response. It's just like the "my one vote doesn't count" mentality, that one voice is not significant or capable of achieving anything versus the ethereal idea of some sort of predestined election outcome outside of one's control.

Am I making any sense? Whatever.

The point is: we have a short time on this planet and we ARE responsible. For everything. I don't care what you believe, but most people pretty much agree that God is not gunna reach his Almighty hand down and influence anything happening on Earth anytime soon. So if I don't do anything, life is basically going to be the same or worse for my children and all the other precious lives that were started after mine. Now, I'm not talking about taking on the weight of the world, shouldering all the responsibility/guilt/burden for every mistreated child in the world, but if we don't allow some of our shame and discomfiture to do it's work and take SOME responsibility, nothing will get better. Women did not get the vote (disgustingly less than 100 years ago), people of color did not get the vote (disturbingly slightly over 100 years), the Civil Rights Act prohibiting discrimination based on race, color, religion, sex, and national origin did not come about (LESS than 44 frakking years ago!) because people sat on their bums and did nothing.

We are still sitting on our bums and doing nothing about all sorts of inequalities in our own "free" nation, not to mention seriously disturbing atrocities like child abuse that I'm pretty sure we can all agree on despite race, color, religion, sex, sexual orientation, national origin or any damned other feature.

Dammit, I don't know what to do at this time in my life. Maybe I am just going to have to be a hell of a lot more informed voter, adopt our next kid, donate to worthy charities, and run for office when I'm sixty years old and have more time. lol. Nobody would vote for me, I'm so damn liberal. What can we do? I dunno. Something. I'll figure it out.